Let me begin by saying DateYourselfGirl is NOT a platform to tell women that they don't need a man. DYG is a platform for women to become the love they seek by doing the inner work. We must become whole mentally, physically, and emotionally before we can embark on the journey to a healthy relationship. It's about self improvement, self empowerment, and self examination!!!
I am a professional actress, host, teacher, and now the brains behind DateYourselfGirl, Inc. I came up with the DateYourselfGirl concept because I have been what I call a “professional single woman” for the past 10 years and decided to start taking myself on dates. Now it’s not because I can’t get a date or that I don’t have any prospects but I came to realize that dating out of loneliness wasn’t the smartest way of fulfilling a void. Why have I been dating myself you ask? Well, it’s this simple. Because I am tired of dating men that aren’t looking for a committed relationship with a woman who’s intelligent, attractive, funny, charming, giving, caring, well you get the point. Instead, they’d rather have several women who are okay with them being promiscuous, insensitive, disrespectful and just incapable of being open to unconditional LOVE. You see, most men that I’ve encountered have been men who aren’t interested in settling down and I blame the culture that we live in today. We are living in what I call a non-committal society. We don’t like something, we quit it and move on to something else just to find out that we don’t like that particular thing either. Whether it is a job or school or hobby or relationship we just don’t want to stay committed to something long term. Oh and let’s not forget the influence of the media and social media. Reality shows have demonstrated to women that it’s okay to accept a man’s non-committal behavior and to tear down the women he’s dealing with when it should be the other way around. I’d rather be by myself until I find that special someone who is willing to be open and honest with me and who’s also willing to work at building a solid foundation with me. And I refuse to be second to his job, friends, or his extracurricular activities, if you know what I mean.
That’s why this movement is so important to me. I want to empower single women, women transitioning out of a relationship, and even married women to become healthier, happier individuals mentally, physically, and emotionally. We’ve got to know that we are worth it. And just because your dating life has taken a pause doesn’t mean you have to.
I also wanted to encourage single women to develop a higher standard when it comes to dating men. No more sub-standard relationships. When we are in transition from one relationship to the next we tend to lower our standards for the sake of companionship. Why waste your time in meaningless relationships? Time is the one thing we can never get back and while you’re catering to a man that will mean absolutely nothing to you in a month or so you could be spending quality time getting to know you a little better. This time can give you the chance to reevaluate yourself which may lead to some revelations about yourself. You may be surprised that you were the cause of a lot of your pain and disappointment. Some of our choices in men are clouded by what we want to see in that man and not what we should see. Sometimes we overlook the late night phone calls or the occasional tardiness or the small, teeny tiny fib about whatever. Ladies those are tale-tale signs that that man may not be in your best interest to date. When a man reveals those types of behaviors so early in a relationship you might want to pump your breaks switch gears to reverse and get the hell out of dodge. You don’t need any more red flags to hit you in the face. Ladies let’s vow to stop giving men another second chance. Stop being so willing to allow more disappointment into your life. My grandmother always said, “When a person shows you who they are, believe it”.
And most importantly I want you to develop a stronger self image. Ladies, just because you are single doesn’t mean you don’t have to look good. I say you should look good even when you are going to the library. I’m not saying you should be in full make-up but a least take pride in your appearance and throw on some lip gloss. Men notice a woman when she looks good. That sends a message that she has a good self-esteem and a higher self-worth. So no more wearing pajama pants in public they are for bed wear. And can we please do away with the pony tail…It’s called a flat iron, use it. I can’t stress enough that a woman who takes pride in herself is someone who people desire to be around. Not an arrogant woman or a boastful woman but a confident woman with her own sense of style, class, and swagger.