You were in a relationship, perhaps one that you thought would last the rest of your life, but now you’re not. You might be sad, angry, or even relieved that it’s over and trying to figure a lot of things out like….. do I un-post to social media, what are people going to think when he’s not in pictures and telling your friends and family that it’s really over.
This is a great time to spend some time with yourself. You can’t know yourself until you spend a fair amount of time alone with yourself. Relationships require a lot of time and take up a lot of mental space and you may not be the same person now that you were when the relationship began.
As tough as it may be, you’ll look back and realize that you're better off and you now have the rest of your life to look forward to. Plus, there are alot of things you can do when you’re single that are harder, or even impossible, to do when you’re in a relationship so embrace your new single status. Stella got her groove back, right?
Here’s some real talk for you sis, take your time before seriously dating again. There’s no rush. I’m sure you’ve heard the best way to get over a man is to get under a new one but it’s really not. Enjoy the benefits of being single before jumping into another relationship. You’re the only one that will know when the time is right so don’t saddle up with Mr. Right Now!
While at first you may miss binge watching shows on Netflix and always having a dinner partner, appreciate your new-found freedom because relationships restrict you in many ways, and not just socially. Now you get to choose what you’re going to watch on TV versus ESPN all day erry-day or enjoying brunch versus without considering that they don’t eat til’ 2 in the afternoon. You can have everything your way for a change so take advantage of your single status by making all of the decisions without having to consult with anyone else.
This is actually a great time to make a list of everything you want to do now that you’re single, before Mr. Do Right comes for you. Create a list that will get you excited, then vow to start doing a few of them. See if you can do everything on your list.
Is there a hobby you’ve always wanted to try like-- (whispers) aerobic pole dancing, LOL? Pick up a hobby you’ve always wanted to try without judgement. You have more free time now. Find an enjoyable way to spend it. Now is the perfect time to try something you’ve been thinking about for years.
This is a perfect time to reconnect with your friends. We often lose track of friends and family while we’re in a relationship. Pick up the phone and let everyone know you’re available to socialize. Take the initiative by inviting a friend out to lunch and catch up. They’ll be glad to hear from you, and you’ll enjoy the company.
Doing something for others is a great way to boost your serotonin, gratitude and put good energy into the universe so consider volunteering. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself after a breakup, one way to help yourself move on is to work with those less fortunate than you. Look around for a cause that stirs your heart and get involved.
I know, letting go of the past isn’t easy, especially if you were together for a long time. It takes time to get over a failed relationship, but there’s also no reason to drag it out longer than necessary. Look forward to the future and leave the past in the past.
Remember that you’re a complete person, even if you don’t have a partner at the moment. Being single doesn’t have to be a bad thing. There’s so much you can do now that you couldn’t before. You can spend more time with your friends and family without feeling guilty. You have more free time and more control over how you spend it. And let me slip this one in, now you have time to read the Bible that you always say you wish you had more time to do. Amen?
Take advantage of being single. Have fun and find yourself again. Another relationship will come along when you’re ready but in the meantime, DateYourselfGirl.